Fire Maidens from Outer Space (1956) Reviews

• Makes Plan 9 Look Like an Epic???

  michaeljacobs2004-01-31

  Somebody else mentioned the shocking level of product placement for Longines watches (and we thought that placement was new in the movie "2001"). What nobody else here has touched on is that dreadful loooooonnnnngggg scene in the observatory in England near the start of the movie where the secretary spends about 20 minutes (well, almost) just walking down the long stairs to bring a report to the chief astronomer, and then spends almost as long going back up (including opening and shutting the safety gate on the stairs...) Yes, truly a movie in which the concept of editing was only a slogan! The rest of the comments above by previous commentators say it all, but I must point out that in the early days of analogue ship controls, all piloting functions appear to be digital, carried out by switching the positions of just two levers (in binary sequence?) to do everything - take off, land, dodge meteors, change course, etc... Even better, when the crew report in after quite a long flight, we cut back to the control centre on Earth, and yes, nobody has moved from their pre-launch positions! (Were their shoes nailed to the floor?) In Britain, we don't get to see MST3K, so I watched this as a late-night stinker, and loved it. I shared the movie with friends on tape, and still feel that it's amongst the funniest B movies I have ever seen, right down there with Plan 9, and without the excuse that it was made by Ed Wood Jr!

• Amazingly sensuous low-tech 50s sci-fi.

  Ian-371999-10-02

  This movie was shown repeatedly on TV between 1957 and the early 60s. Anyone who saw it in the 50s remembers the soundtrack and the hot Fire Maidens! It was a silly low-tech movie, yes, but it was no worse than any other implausible sci-fi flick of that pre-spaceflight era. This movie is what it is, and what it is, is a pleasurable escapist marshmallow. See it if you can - you'll get a few laughs out of it.

• Did you ever wonder what happened to Anthony Dexter after VALENTINO? Me neither, but here he is!

  reptilicus2001-03-24

  If I had a dollar, no better make that five dollars in these inflationary days, for every time Cy Roth's name appeared on the screen during the opening credits for this film I'd have enough to make my own movie! A bunch of British astronauts take an exploratory trip to the 13th moon of Jupiter (a neat trick in itself since this was made in 1956 and Jupiter's 13th moon was not even discovered until the late 1970's!) and discover a race of mini-skirted sex kittens who are the descendants of the survivors of Atlantis who left Earth some 3000 years ago! There is only one man on the planet and he is quite old so the girls welcome the arrival of young, virile men. Now in real life the guys would probably dismantle the rocket and live happily ever after. But do they in this movie? NOOOOOOOOOOOO! They are veddy proper Englishmen and they just want to go home! ("I'm a happily married man." one of them even states with quite the stiff upper lip.) Oh, there is one other male on the planet, a weird mutant known as The Creature. This has got to be one of the most laughable monsters in movie history. A skinny guy in a black bodysuit with clearly visible zipper and an unmoving fright mask. Yow! Even Larry Buchanan's monsters weren't that bad! Susan Shaw and Jacqueline Curtis are the Fire Maidens who get the most screen time but in the crowd is Kim Parker who would go face-to-whatever with the FIEND WITHOUT A FACE in 1958. This movie used to run on late-late shows all the time. It desperately needs to be released on video for a new generation to see. Yes kids, once upon a time people actually paid 35 cents on Saturday afternoons to see stuff like this.

• Atlantis, outer space, monsters and beauties.

  Nozze-Foto2002-03-19

  Okay now let me get this straight, the people of Atlantis escaped their sinking continent by blasting off into space where they colonized the 13th moon of Jupiter so 3000 years ago. Now only a dozen or so are left and they are all young, attractive women and just one middle aged man who claims to be the father of all of them. As a certain pointy eared TV character might say, "Fascinating captain." This movie has got to be the culmination of many male fantasies all rolled into one. A bunch of guys from Earth land on the on the planet, which has breathable atmosphere and plenty of sunlight despite being hundreds of millions of miles further from the sun than Earth. They encounter a bunch of miniskirted, barefoot, submissive women (one of whom even exclaims "Men at last!" so you know what has been on their minds!) and get a chance to play hero by defeating a monster called The Creature (a man in a black bodysuit and a monster mask). Unique to say the least. Actually I found myself liking it because of its very ineptness. The photographer never lets us forget the girls sex appeal since the camera is often on ground level giving us a good look at their legs and there is also a long interpretive dance scene. I would say they don't make them like this anymore but the truth is the do, you can find movies similar to this on USA Network every Saturday night at 3 AM.

• A brief respite into 1950's nonsense.

  gavcrimson2004-04-24

  Warning: spoilers. Eros was a typical British B movie production/distribution outfit of the 1950s who naturally drifted towards horror and sci-fi, a field in which their output ranges from the highly-regarded Fiend Without a Face to cheap, cheerful and not very highly-regarded films which is where 1957's The Woman Eater (mad scientist and bongo playing ‘native' feed buxom women to a carnivorous tree) and this comes in. In keeping with the British B movie producer's optimistic reasoning that casting an overseas lead will ensure a worldwide sale here we have American actor Anthony Dexter as the leader of a group of astronauts sent into space to explore the thirteenth moon of Jupiter. The rest of the crew consists of British actors saddled with false American accents. They're not that bad considering, even if it is slightly odd seeing Harry Fowler who specialised in playing Cockney wide-boy types sprouting Americanisms. The blurring of US and British origins also extends to the awkward opening in which stock footage of a plane is captioned ‘New Mexico' and ‘New York City', meaningless name dropping considering the plane in question is on the way to London, where the subsequent space mission is inter-cut with scientists chain smoking and trying to look concerned at the ‘American British Astronomical Station'. British Sci-Fi films from the 50's/60's have a reputation for being notoriously dull (Stranger from Venus, The Body Stealers, They Came from Beyond Space, Spaceways immediately spring to mind) and the first twenty minutes of Fire Maidens from Outer Space doesn't bode well with the director's idea of excitement consisting of the ship bound cast watching a large screen meant to be showing them the wonders of the cosmos outside. `Reminds me of my wife when she's mad' remarks one of the astronauts after witnessing a meteor storm. By the time they touch down on the thirteenth moon of Jupiter things seem to get more interesting though and it also becomes clear that Fire Maidens from Outer Space is a sci-fi film that due to lack of funds or lack of imagination contains very little by way of sci-fi trappings. HQ keeps in touch with the spaceship via a standard telephone and the men don't even have spacesuits. Even so nothing can prepare you for the shock that the thirteenth moon of Jupiter looks exactly like a beauty spot in the leafy English countryside -somewhere in Surrey being the most likely locale- with absolutely no attempt made to evoke an alien terrain. `The atmosphere on the thirteenth moon of Jupiter is similar to that on Earth' comments one of the men, never have truer words been said. Another plus for the men is that the planet is populated by the titular fire maidens who'll throw themselves at any passing astronaut (`by the law of Atlantis I am yours') and do much posing and running about on cardboard sets. Their leader Prasus claims to be descended from the last survivor of the city of Atlantis. He's an old goat who has clearly been putting it about a bit, since the fire maidens- all 16 of them -are meant to be his daughters. Contemplating a vulgar painting of a blonde starlet that looks as if it belongs at the front of a strip-club, he then -with a remarkably straight face- tells the astronauts `she was my mother's mother'. Prasus is portrayed as a bit of a drunk- giving a rousing speech then collapsing into an alcoholic stupor- a character trait possibly introduced to ease over some shameful overacting. In an unexpectedly highbrow touch the fire maidens also perform ballet –and remarkably well it has to be said- to Borodin's Polovetsin Dances. Thankfully a mutant, or rather `the man with the head of a beast' is also on hand to terrorise Planet Surrey and bring some much needed dramatic conflict inbetween bouts of Borodin. Needless to say Fire Maidens from Outer Space is an absolute hoot, not played completely for comedy, but not without a sense of its own absurdity either. After Prasus tells the men of his Atlantis origins one of them accurately notes `this guy's batty'. In its own coy, Playboy hidden inside a copy of a scientific journal way this is also the 1950's predecessor to The Sexplorer and especially Michael Cort's Zeta One. All short skirts and blank expressions the alien beauties come across like cocktail hostesses and accordingly the men behave more like slimy bachelors on the prowl than astronauts. The men are fairly contradictorily characters actually, spending much of the film eying up the women and making crass comments yet when it is suggested they could help repopulate the fire maiden's race one of them protests `wait a minute I'm a happily married man'. Social historians will have a field day analysing the film in terms of 1950's sexual politics, everyone else will be intrigued as to how Prasus has managed to father 16 daughters despite the notable absence of any mothers of the fire maidens from outer space.