Hidden in the Woods (2014) Reviews

• The most inept filmmaking I've seen in years

  BennyM2016-06-02

  The very idea of transposing a story so obviously set in a machismo banana republic to America is idiocy on a level all its own. But apart from that, I'm having trouble deciding which was more painful here: The amateurish writing, the cheap iPhone look of the digital photography, the incompetent editing, the dead-voiced rendition of Amazing Grace over the end credits, or the knowledge that Michael Biehn has fallen so far as to produce and headline in dreck like this. The fact that I managed to sit through this mess should be testament to my tolerance level, as should the fact that I've given the film two stars rather than one, just because it has William Forsythe in it. Even he can't do anything with the ridiculous clichés he's given to work with, though. I'm sure someone will tell me that I should watch the original to see a better version. But I'm not going to. If the second time around is this bad with the same director at the helm, how good can the first one be?

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• Un-hidden ineptitude

  TheLittleSongbird2018-12-21

  'Hidden in the Woods' cropped up in my recommended for you section and the concept was halfway interesting, though not an original one. Was not exactly excited and was somewhat apprehensive with the low rating and the few reviews as of present not being good, which has often lowered expectations and most films with both have turned out to be that bad. Watching it, 'Hidden in the Woods' is another example of those films, one seen with not so high expectations that had things that made me cautious and sadly turned out to be that bad. The potential wasn't massive but what there was is diminished completely by beyond poor execution. Have seen far worse films, recently and overall, and it is not irredeemably bad, but of my recent viewings, 'Hidden in the Woods' for me is up there with the most ineptly executed films. Its best, and only, saving grace is the sadistically creepy performance of Michael Biehn, the one component that saw any conscientiousness or effort. This cannot be said for the acting of the daughters, which came over as wooden in some places and shrill in others, or even both in the same scene. Did not buy their situation or feel it, and if all the characters were better written that already would have made things better. None of the characters are properly developed or built up and they bore and irritate rather than endear and being rootable. Better writing would have helped, because the stilted, cheesy and limp script here seemed like it was written as an afterthought. The direction has no character or personality. Furthermore, it doesn't even look good, with some of the most ineptly shoddy photography and editing to come my way in a while. The sound is obvious and intrusive, and yes that "Amazing Grace" rendition gave off an unintentionally creepy vibe and so monotonous. The story was the worst asset, no tension or suspense with gratuitous violence. Much of it is uneventful and dull and when things finally get a move on far too late into the film that is where things become rushed and the ending is not much of one at all. Overall, another very bad film. 2/10 (1 has been a relatively rare rating recently and saved only for films and such with no redeeming merits or effort, Biehn's performance just about saves that from happening here) Bethany Cox

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• The original was a lot better

  joshjack-356802019-01-29

  If you want to see a really good version of this film. Watch the original Chilean version. Its in Spanish with English subtitles but its a lot better than this atrocity. And Michael biehns acting was horrible. And i like Michael biehns acting too. But this was his worst.

• No one steals from me

  nogodnomasters2017-08-29

  This review is for the US remake of the Chilean film. Dad (Michael Biehn) deals drugs, mom is dead. Dad sire son from oldest daughter Ana (Jeannine Kaspar) who they keep locked up, but seems normal. Anny (Electra Avellan) is the younger daughter and excuse me if I have them confused. Dad winds up in prison and the girls hide out in a shack, used by their dad. They actually don't make it to any woods until there is 16 minutes left in the film and it doesn't last long. Uncle Costello (William Forsythe) sends his goons to find the girls and the drugs. This felt like an abduction film. They didn't build the girl's character enough to make you feel for them, as if Director Patricio Valladares was simply using them like the Johns in the film. Some good performances, but the plot seemed weak. Guide: F-word, rape, sex, brief nudity? Note to self: If you are sitting on 30 kilos, don't teach your kids 911.

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• Gritty, Gruesome, & a Guilty Pleasure!

  MichaelWeihn2016-12-07

  First of all if you're looking for an Academy Award winning ground breaking high budget blockbuster film you can skip this one. I first watched this film within the past year and now I've seen it a half a dozen times. It has so much going for it that I never tire from reviewing. Michael Biehn stars in his most sadistic and downright mean character to date and delivers a brilliant performance. William Forsythe adds to the mix beautifully as usual. The cast overall meshes perfectly as well. I'm not going to spoil any plot points but I will say if you enjoy horror, thriller, and/or action films this one blends the genres effortlessly so this might be for you. I like the gritty, backwoods feel which umbrellas the atmosphere of the movie. This remake sports the same director as the original so the intentions are not lost. Finally there are great one-liners in the excellent script. One warning though: If you are squeamish when in comes to uncomfortable domestic situations and cold blooded murder then you might want to opt for Dory or Madea.

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